The Grand Tour

Jeremy Clarkson Admits Farm Is “A Disaster” After Year Of Slow Sales And Low Performance

Jeremy Clarkson has been working on his new farming show ‘I Bought The Farm’ for around a year now, but it’s been a long and disrupted journey for The Grand Tour presenter who has taken to his latest column to explain just how difficult it has been. Of course, the Coronavirus pandemic has had a major effect on the farm, which he describes as “a disaster”.

Another issue has come on the form of seasonal products.

“It is extremely inconvenient for the customer,” he writes in his column for The Sunday Times.

“Today, for instance, I have rhubarb, but you’d better hurry if you fancy some because I only have eight stalks and there’s no chance of a top-up until May.”

“I do have plenty of chard, though, which to begin with wasn’t selling at all.

“It turns out that people round here (including me) don’t know what chard is, so I’m now calling it spinach and it’s flying off the shelves..

He jokes, “that’s probably illegal.”

He admits that on opening his Diddly Squat Farm Shop, customers were wanting different products than the produce he had on sale.

“All the spuds had gone to seed. It was a disaster,” he said.

“And virtually nothing else was ready to be picked. The apples were tiny sour bullets, the wasabi was string, the vegetables were barely out of the ground and my water-bottling plant was still just a pipe dream.

“Actually, scratch that: it was only a pipe.”

Because of this, Clarkson was forced to buy stock from other local farmers and wholesalers, despite promising at the beginning of the project that he would only be selling his own produce grown on his farm.

“I desperately want to sell what I’m growing but even when it’s all ready.

“I’m not sure it’s stuff people want to buy. I mean, who wants an ear of corn? Or a bit of rape?”

The ex-Top Gear presenter was able to sell his pigs for a profit and is now wondering what he should do with his lambs.

“Right now I’m faced with a choice of selling them as they are or paying for some supplementary feed and selling them later, all fattened up,” he explained.

“I’ve done the maths and either way I lose exactly the same amount of money.”

February saw the doors to his farm shop open with an Instagram post claiming that he “will put the supermarkets out of business. Bye, bye Aldi!”

Unfortunately, this hasn’t happened, but we will be able to watch the drama unfold as he releases his new show on Amazon Prime Video later this year.

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