You remember when people would take Pontiac Fieros and dress them up as Ferraris to fool ten-year-olds in the Target parking lot? Yeah, this Craigslist posting is basically that. But reliable!
Underneath, this “Ferrari F430” is actually a four-cylinder, front-wheel drive Toyota Celica. Eloquently described as “a practical sport car sitting on a super fancy coat,” the seller adds that the car comes with Ferrari gauges, a Ferrari steering wheel, and Ferrari seats and seat belt covers (we’re supposed to take his word for it, since there isn’t a single interior shot). It additionally has a Ferrari engine cover, and is “looking 100% real from the outside.”
This ad is also home to one of the most hilariously awful and downright incorrect pairs of sentences I’ve ever seen. Completely unedited, it reads: “If you are a car enthusiast like me, you should probably know that a Toyota Sport car is more tunnerbale or modifiable than a Ferrari. I don’t think even a 458 can out run a 2jz supra.”
Let me begin analyzing that biblical word dump by asserting that no, a 2JZ-powered Supra, no matter now “tunnerbale,” cannot outrun a Ferrari 458 unless that Supra has had the price of another Supra’s worth of mods installed. I don’t even know why that’s in there, because nowhere else in the ad does he mention a Supra, especially since the 2001 Celica on which this “Ferrari” is based has absolutely nothing in common with one. (I assume that’s the model year Celica because the seller describes it initially as a “2001 F430,” even though the Ferrari F430 came out in 2004.)
The seller goes on to say that he “was gonna paint it red cud Ferrari comes in black, red and yellow.” It does not take much research to discover that Ferrari does, in fact, offer more colors than black, red, and yellow. Blue, for example. In certain rare cases, they even go all the way to silver.
But by far, the most ridiculous part of this ad is the price. The seller wants a whopping $25,000 for this car, despite the fact that you’re still buying a goddamn Celica, which is barely worth a fifth of that. I can only conclude that he either spent far, far too much on this conversion (which still needs a likely thousand-dollar paint job, by the way), or he’s just a moron. At this point, both are equally likely to be true.
At least there’s one silver lining: the seller notes at the very end of the listing, without even adding a period, that he has the “Clean title in hand btw”. Thank God.
If you don’t believe me and want to read the actual listing, you can check it out here. It’s absolutely worth a look.